tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63122493837838070972024-03-13T23:41:59.889-07:00The Sleazy Universe of Cig NeutronScience Fiction for the drug culture.Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-72871642219720992192013-09-11T23:45:00.001-07:002013-09-11T23:45:04.909-07:00Breath Prowler MiniatureSo I've been sculpting miniatures for <a href="http://magecompany.com/">Mage Company's</a> new Table top game The Amityville Project: Phobos. This guy is one of my favorites I've sculpted so far and he's only 50 mm tall! They just launched a Kickstarter for the game which you can check out <a href="http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/magecompany/the-amityville-project-phobos?ref=live">Here! </a> The 2D art for the game is phenomenal as well , definitely worth checking out especially if you're fans of D&D or Magic the Gathering.<br />
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-82393729372143470742013-05-09T18:57:00.000-07:002013-05-09T18:57:12.012-07:00Shebop and Rocksexy for GMWAT5This is my piece for the Gag Me With a Toon 5 show at the WWA gallery, currently on exhibit.<br />
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-1547019079498946712013-04-03T20:48:00.001-07:002013-04-03T20:48:31.049-07:00Courage the Cowardly DogThis is my piece for the Saturday Morning Cartoon show at Comic Hero University <a href="https://www.facebook.com/events/310893279037362">Link</a> I love Courage and was so happy with how this came out.<br />
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-8220238890641198332013-03-20T19:57:00.002-07:002013-03-20T19:57:25.174-07:00The Incredibly Gnarly Hulk Progress photosI got a commission to do the Hulk. At first I was apprehensive because I don't normally sculpt muscular dudes. As I go along however I'm having a blast and I'm really happy with the way this is coming out. I'm pleased with how I'm infusing my style with the character. I really wanted to represent the Hulk as the scary-ass, unstoppable motherfucker that he is. A total Berserker that takes joy in destruction. That's my take on him. enjoy!<br />
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-11204056658494220102013-03-15T21:28:00.000-07:002013-03-15T21:41:26.726-07:00Rub-A-Dub Beelzebub Satanic Soaps!I finally decided to start making soaps which I've wanted to do for the longest time. So here's my Rub-A-Dub Beelzebub soap line. I've got a lot more in the works too. If you'd like to order them go to <a href="http://bizarroaugogo.com/">http://bizarroaugogo.com</a><br />
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Inverted Scentagram<br />
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Lye-Vay<br />
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The Sanitizing Oracle<br />
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And here's a sweet ad for the Sanitizing Oracle</div>
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-81978824735448536142013-03-04T23:26:00.000-08:002013-03-04T23:26:47.417-08:00Bizarro Au Go-Go does the Harlem shakeWe got all our freaky friends to come out and shake with us.<br />
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<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Tf0B-DE9rg0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-10127606103954957452013-01-27T22:13:00.000-08:002013-01-27T22:13:00.432-08:00Rum SwizzleRum Swizzle is the lead singer for the Ultra popular Crapulon Thrash band Dem<span style="font-family: Times, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 16px; text-align: -webkit-left; white-space: nowrap;">önShitf</span><span style="background-color: white; line-height: 16px; text-align: -webkit-left; white-space: nowrap;">äcer. Rum has the loudest known voice ever to be recorded in the universe.</span></span><br />
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-5138604136194286812013-01-17T16:50:00.000-08:002013-01-17T16:50:16.303-08:00Lobo!<br />
I made this for the Hive Gallery's Road to Comiccon show last year. it was a quick sculpt but I'm really pleased with it.<br />
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Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-9934678212265141372012-12-09T19:41:00.000-08:002012-12-09T19:41:26.690-08:004 Whoresman of the ApocalypseI was approached to be a part of the End of Days show going on at Sacred Gallery in NYC. I was totally stoked because I've always been fascinated with doomsday mythologies. I've always love the 4 Horseman theme so I wanted to put my own spin on that idea. So I did the 4 Whoresman of the Apocalyspe, basically combining all 4 horseman into one demon entity riding a horse made of 4 chicks bondaged together. here's the final piece. Hope you enjoy!<br />
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Click to enlarge:<br />
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and heres a shot of the Whorse herself:<br />
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-70097614098284542922012-12-07T19:21:00.002-08:002012-12-07T19:21:21.080-08:00Alien Xenomorph commission<span style="background-color: #d3dfd1; color: #2c3635; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; text-align: left;">I always wanted to sculpt an Alien but never really had a reason too especially since everyone and their brother has done an alien sculpture, but I got commissioned to do one so here it is. It's not any particular version of the Xenomorph just me taking bits and pieces I like from each design and put my spin on it.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #d3dfd1; color: #2c3635; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; text-align: left;">If you want to commission for something email me at cigneutron@gmail.com</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #d3dfd1; color: #2c3635; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; text-align: left;"><br /></span>Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-87080620116438471232012-11-20T18:43:00.000-08:002012-11-20T19:02:30.074-08:00Violator CommissionI was commissioned by tattoo artist Justin Mariani to put my own spin on Violator from the Spawn series. I was super stoked to do this because as a kid I LOVED Violator. This was so much fun to do and I'm super pleased with how it came out. Click to Enlarge:<br />
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If you want to commission me email me at cigneutron@gmail.com<br />
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-77979859058969560442012-11-20T18:36:00.000-08:002012-11-30T20:04:42.432-08:00Hellgoon and Frank SapienMy friend and amazing artist Cecil Porter's <a href="http://www.cecilportertattoos.com/">http://www.cecilportertattoos.com</a> birthday was coming up and I wanted to sculpt him something. His two favorite Comic books were Hellboy and The Goon. I couldn't decide which one to sculpt so I just did them both...in one! Enjoy. Click to enlarge:<br />
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If you want to commission me email me at cigneutron@gmail.com<br />
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Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-51273915901839117392012-09-10T01:14:00.000-07:002012-10-03T23:28:52.458-07:00Insane in the Motherbrain!I wanted to sculpt my take on Motherbrain from Metroid. I was always a
fan of the Captain N Motherbrain so I decided to mix the video game
version with the cartoon version and sprinkle on a little of my
cignature sleaze. Check out the
timelapse video I put together that shows my entire process from start
to finish at warp speed <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SYabDArsEAU&feature=relmfu">HERE</a><br />
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Click the photos to enlarge<br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-wN9hKHGPBN0/T6JfT_mU92I/AAAAAAAAADo/sXZTGrH5vgQ/s1600/sagdylion.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-wN9hKHGPBN0/T6JfT_mU92I/AAAAAAAAADo/sXZTGrH5vgQ/s1600/sagdylion.jpg" /></a></div>
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Sagdylions are odd creatures that inhabit another Dimension. Upon entering our dimension they are only visible to children. Adults can only see Sagdylions under the influence of LSD. These creatures have become known to earthlings as Boogeymen. Sagdylions use their strange mix of cute features to lure children back to their dimension where they viciously devour them.<br />
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<br />Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-56987187740063607152011-09-13T23:45:00.000-07:002011-09-13T23:45:26.105-07:00Encyclosleazia Shittanica excerpt on The Bud Mizer<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Iwnofj-JvkU/TnBMnMJM6qI/AAAAAAAAABI/TkBNuf5VFnY/s1600/75353_176199975724646_100000039333603_638461_4407101_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Iwnofj-JvkU/TnBMnMJM6qI/AAAAAAAAABI/TkBNuf5VFnY/s640/75353_176199975724646_100000039333603_638461_4407101_n.jpg" width="442" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The head of the Bud Mizer, taken by Cig Neutron</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</tbody></table> All Crapulons are pretty vile and disgusting but the Bud Mizer somehow outdoes most of his fellow race. At a young age the Bud Mizer assembled a gang that raised hell all around mullock. Their habit of pissing on the heads of their victims after they have brutally beaten them, earned them the name "The Pissheads". They have since lovingly embraced this name.<br />
Although the Bud Mizer is a vicious killer, he's not stupid. Earth booze was in High demand on Mullock and seeing a golden oppurtunity him and his gang Hijacked a supply ship and headed for earth. HIs plan was to set up a base on Mars and control any alcohol that came off the neighboring planet. He succeeded and now makes huge profits by controlling earth booze. <br />
Controlling such a lucrative operation is not without its fair share of problems. Rival Gangs are constantly trying to gain control of the earth booze trade. Secondly The Pissheads have to aquire the alcohol from earth without any earthlings knowing of their existence. For this reason they make frequent pickups from the southern parts of the united states, where if someone were to come forward with a sighting, their claim would be dismissed. While the humans that populate these areas might not be credible they are whoever armed and dangereous. This has become quite bothersome as many pickup crews have been attacked by groups of rednecks looking to save their booze.<br />
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See more of the Bud Mizer in the book Bizarro Au Go-Go available at <a href="http://%20bizarroaugogo.com/">http:// bizarroaugogo.com</a>Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-68902504015587459682011-09-13T15:22:00.000-07:002011-09-25T15:30:21.933-07:00Encyclosleazia Shittanica Excerpt on Lady Scourge<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-OUcPyo8gaE0/Tm_WWJgnkAI/AAAAAAAAABE/TrpsCpfoNrs/s1600/257770_231447240199919_100000039333603_1051743_1400415_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="572" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-OUcPyo8gaE0/Tm_WWJgnkAI/AAAAAAAAABE/TrpsCpfoNrs/s640/257770_231447240199919_100000039333603_1051743_1400415_o.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lady Scourge smoking the finest Intergalactic Opium piracy can offer.</td></tr>
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Once a beautiful human geisha by the name Akahana, she was kidnapped by the infamous demon gang The Radical 194. The Same night of her capture The Radical 194 had a coup de tat overthrowing their leader Kyouaku. Having no more use for the geisha or Kyouaku they discarded both of their bodies believing them to be dead. Akahana comes to, and realizes she's lying next to the former leader of the gang she despises. So distraught over her ordeal she finishes off Kyouaku with his own katana, and then commits jumangi gari with the same blade. <br />
Once the demon blood mixed with hers she became possesed by Kyouaku. Being in a weakened state he only had minor demonic powers left and could not take full possesion of the geisha. Still in control of her own body but with newly aquired demon powers the geisha and kyouaku reluctantly worked together to exact revenge upon The Radical 194.<br />
Their power growing with each member slain, the geisha in turn lost more and more of her humanity. Sometime after defeating the Radical 194 the onigeisha crossed paths with a space pirate crew repairing their ship after an emergency landing on earth. After a short scuffle the pirates bowed down to the onigeisha's power and she became their Captain. Upon accompanying them into space she adopted the moniker Lady Scourge, and quickly became one of the most ruthless space pirates in the universe.<br />
As Cig Netron's infamy grew, it attracted the attention of the Onigeisha and her crew. Now She's on a mission to find him and rip him to shreds to find out what makes him so powerful.<br />
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See more of Lady Scourge in the book Bizarro Au Go-Go available at <a href="http://http/;//bizarroaugogo.com">http://bizarroaugogo.com</a>Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-23536370989857167022011-09-13T15:11:00.000-07:002011-09-13T15:25:36.188-07:00Encyclosleazia Shittanica excerpt on Buttgrubs<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5KYa8krhQLI/Tm_UG8cxKEI/AAAAAAAAABA/FdtAUGAZ3wk/s1600/240993_225133927497917_100000039333603_1000343_2772876_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-5KYa8krhQLI/Tm_UG8cxKEI/AAAAAAAAABA/FdtAUGAZ3wk/s640/240993_225133927497917_100000039333603_1000343_2772876_o.jpg" width="547" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">A typical Buttgrub, looking oddly guilty as always</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</tbody></table> Creatures that are rarely seen, but often felt. Buttgrubs just have a compulsive need to touch the butts of everything in the universe. No one knows why, and no one knows where they came from (some say Uranus.) Buttgrubs are harmless in the creepiest sense of the word. They really don't do anything but touch butts. They are so elusive however that not much is know about they're culture. <br />
The majority of buttgrubs are content with just cupping a cheek. No squeezing, just cupping, but every so often there will be a feisty one that loves to pinch. It's been rumored that there is a gang of buttgrubs that deal stealth wedgies. People refer to this alleged group as The Phantom wedgies.<br />
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See more Buttgrubs in the book Bizarro Au Go-Go available at <a href="http://bizarroaugogo.com/">http://bizarroaugogo.com</a>Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-692669492924506522011-08-25T13:34:00.000-07:002011-08-25T13:34:58.627-07:00Encyclosleazia Shittanica excerpt: Bingebugs<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Alizlij1DXw/TlavGF3BQsI/AAAAAAAAAA8/sswL5rAj7qE/s1600/_ROD5532.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Alizlij1DXw/TlavGF3BQsI/AAAAAAAAAA8/sswL5rAj7qE/s640/_ROD5532.JPG" width="425" /></a></div><br />
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Infesting seedy bars around the universe (which is basically EVERY bar in the universe) Bingbugs are parasites that prey on lightweight patrons. Without the means to directly ingest the drugs and alcohol they need to survive, Bingebugs usually wait in the shadows until someone passes out from drinking too much. They then squish their way over and latch themselves onto the victim's head.<br />
Upon awakening the victim is overcome with the urge to consume copious amounts of drugs and alcohol before the Bingebug liquifys their brain and sucks up the substance laced brain soup. The bingebug then detaches and crawls off to find the next unfortunate lifeform.<br />
This process leaves the victim completely brainless resulting in a condition known as "the Bingebug Blues." Once in this state those afflicted are practically walking corpses, left with only the most basic motor functions.These "zombies" are too stupid to be dangerous, but they have become a problem in areas in which they overpopulate. One can imagine crowds of unintelligent bodies milling about can get pretty obtrusive.<br />
Bar owners don't even bother to exterminate bingebugs if they have an infestation. Let's face it, an organism that forces people to consume drugs and alcohol is good for business. Bartenders have even been known to purchase and keep bingebugs as pets.<br />
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if you would like a bingebug hat email Cig at cigneutron@gmail.com for detailsCig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-15292185495117715612011-04-12T02:08:00.000-07:002012-07-26T13:02:36.275-07:00Encyclosleazia Shittanica excerpt: Yeyons<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-mtc6nzs5ZrQ/TaQV8atqeII/AAAAAAAAAA4/cY-ohgzpabU/s1600/20101116194241-1madmerkslogo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-mtc6nzs5ZrQ/TaQV8atqeII/AAAAAAAAAA4/cY-ohgzpabU/s640/20101116194241-1madmerkslogo.jpg" width="521" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The Head of the infamous yeyonian scientist taken by Cig Neutron, the Mad Dr. Merk</td></tr>
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Paranoid, reclusive, and deathly intelligent, Yeyons are the twacked out masterminds of the universe. Driven by constant cocaine use yeyons are most likely THE most productive race in the universe. About 82% of all the universe's technology came from the Yeyons. While keeping them productive, all that cocaine makes them paranoid and anti social. <br />
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All yeyons live alone constantly expanding their fortress like laboratories...or fortratories. They are always toiling away making new inventions and observing experiments. If they get lonely they invent company. If they get bored they invent entertainment. The only family a yeyon has is the one he may or may not create for himself. No one has yet to solve the mystery of how yeyons reproduce since they are all so reclusive. <br />
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Almost all yeyons wear goggles, but not for the mad scientist aesthetic. Yeyon's noses bleed constantly from the never ending cocaine use. Since their eyes are unfortunately located beneath their nostrils they must protect their eyes from the bloody faucet that is they're nose.<br />
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Yeyons love dabbling in genetics. Creating hideous creatures and even pitting them against rival yeyon's creatures in the Slaughter pit, a gruesome coliseum located on Raileon 5. In fact many creatures that can be found around the universe have come from Yeyons whether intentionally or not. The Slagitrons for instance were a failed yeyonian experiment.<br />
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The yeyons live on Raileon. A barren desert-like planet. Once Raileon had become too crowded with fortratories, the yeyons constructed a new Raileon identical to the first. They have constructed 5 Raileons to date.<br />
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If a yeyon goes too long without cocaine the larger eyes on their forehead open up and they fall into a permanent murderous rage bent on destroying anything around in the pursuit of cocaine. This condition is irreversible and is a great fear of the Yeyons. These feral Yeyons are known as fiends and populate the desolate wastelands outside Yeyonian fortratories. There is no reasoning with a fiend and they are considered highly dangerous. All Yeyon fortratories must have defenses against these awful creatures.Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-65449489528195618382011-03-20T14:50:00.000-07:002012-07-26T13:06:18.022-07:00Encyclosleazia Shittanica excerpt: Cigaratts<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-gl13FhERepk/TYZ1P7eBgmI/AAAAAAAAAA0/ZwxSg0EbsVk/s1600/cigarattcouples.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="424" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-gl13FhERepk/TYZ1P7eBgmI/AAAAAAAAAA0/ZwxSg0EbsVk/s640/cigarattcouples.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
While they may look oddly cute, cigaratts are nasty, ill-tempered, and constantly in need of a nicotine fix. They are the vermin of the universe infesting anywhere cigarettes can be found. Cig Neutron absolutely loathes these creatures more than anything in the universe as his spaceship is teeming with them.<br />
If you ever got close enough to inspect a cigaratt you would see that behind their nicotine stained teeth sits a hairy tongue. This can tell you how old a cigaratt is. The hairier the tongue, the older the cigaratt.<br />
While smoking a cigarette the hot air inflates the ratts body making it possible for it to float around. Once they digest the smoke they dispell it from their anus in a small smoke ring, this also serves in propelling the cigaratt. If you pull a cigarette from a ratts mouth mid float, the cigaratt will deflate wildly like an out of control balloon.<br />
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In a pinch cigaratts can be used as makeshift smoke bombs for those in need of a quick getaway.Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6312249383783807097.post-85817644033898561902011-03-20T00:31:00.000-07:002011-03-20T03:51:19.277-07:00Encyclosleazia Shittanica excerpt: Crapulon<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-rBKQiPaL-cE/TYWsE6WbFgI/AAAAAAAAAAw/WQ2Bh3N7riY/s1600/jdh1s.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/-rBKQiPaL-cE/TYWsE6WbFgI/AAAAAAAAAAw/WQ2Bh3N7riY/s640/jdh1s.jpg" width="472" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Jacky Dan Hands, guitarist for Demonshitfacer one of the most popular Crapulon bands of all time</td></tr>
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Rowdy, nihilistic, and perpetually drunk. Crapulons are among the most homely denizens of the universe. The only sober Crapulon is a dead Crapulon. While they require nothing but alchohol for sustenance they do have a certain affinity for bologna...and 80's earth hair metal. Not that such a thing as hair metal could be considered sustenance, but they would nonetheless die without it. It's rumored that Joey Tempest wrote the Final Countdown after Europe was abducted by Crapulons, who promptly returned the band after they stole all the play from the hot female inhabitants of Venus while en route to the Crapulon's home planet of Mullock.<br />
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Life on Mullock is one of complete anarchy, but that's not to say it is chaotic. Most Crapulons have a generally nonviolent, though obtrusive disposition. They are just much too sloshed to even attempt to form something such as social order, or daily hygiene routines. Rules are opinions, and if there is a dispute, the "rule" that comes from the lips of the bigger Crapulon is followed. Although size is not always a determining factor. A broken bottle shank to the eye can also have a Crapulon seeing your way, quite instantaneously in fact.<br />
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Pregnant Crapulon females are highly feared for not only are they completely unpredictable what with being hopped up on baby crazies, but they have an even more insatiable appetite for alcohol. One pregnant female can dry up an entire alcohol spring, but hey she's drinking for two right? Fortunately Crapulon pregnancy only lasts the equivalent of one earth day. It goes without saying that procreation is highly discouraged on Mullock, not that any Crapulon would want offspring anyway. Family life is unheard of in Crapulon culture. Crapulon birth is likened to that of a large bowel movement after which baby Crapulons, or crappies, end up in the sewer living off of Crapulon excrement until the day they mature and surface to make their skidmark on the world. <br />
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It's said that some Crappies never come back to the surface....<br />
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Crapulons get their alcohol supply from the many alcohol springs that can be found around Mullock. After it became widely known that earthlings have a knack for brewing alcohol. Earth alcohol became a precious commodity on Mullock, especially with Gangs like the Pissheads constantly trying to monopolize the supply.<br />
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With constantly consuming alcohol (and the occasional bologna) Crapulon piss is EXTREMELY volatile, and somehow has a higher proof than the alcohol that went in. Realizing that all Crapulons are just walking re-distilleries, space entrepreneur and all around scumbag Nat P. Duggits cashed in on this phenomena after he began bottling it and selling it under the guise "Nat P. Duggits' Spitfire Hooch". It remains THE most potent alcoholic drink in the universe.Cig Neutronhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00288415342702619519noreply@blogger.com1